Bllllllaaahhhhh

I'm tired....
But i thought i'd better write something before i go to bed. It's been a long time since i last posted so i owe it to you really, my poor destitute page of digitalness. I suggest anyone with eyes doesn't read it. Chances are it'll be really pointless and boring.
But what should i write...all i can really think of writing about is that fact that i'm a total retard, really. And i mean that in the kindest of ways...most of the time...
Seriously, i get in everyone's way at work and i just generally do things without thinking...I'm also convinced that my brain has gotten dumber. I'm so bad at remembering names and just general facts that it makes my pride cry. Oh, woe is me who can't even spell or relate to anyone because i'm just too...um...I CAN'T EVEN THINK OF A WAY TO END THAT SENTENCE! OX
Lol! XD Yay for over dramatisation! It doesn't bother me that much but it can be a pain...especially when i'm talking to people. Since my brain is now essentially a pile of mush most the time i can't think of anything to talk about in conversations...nothing interesting or appropriate anyway. It's all smut or self absorbed drivel. I either let the awkward 'we should really make a conversation' moment slide or end up spurting out something that doesn't make any sense or can be taken the wrong way. *sigh* such is my life
...I'm sure i'm not the only one though. Gees, there are probably a million people out there who make worse conversations and get it to worse situations than i do but i just feel that i should be better than that...Once again, i suppose i'm not the only one...*shrugs* Getting it down somewhere just makes me feel less worried i suppose. If i tell someone about it, my subconscious is incline to take that as the go-ahead to get pity and slack off. However, if i write my ideas down it's me and only me at that time. I won't get pity from myself and that means i won't slack off. If i slack off i'll become arrogant and everything will blow up in my face. Also there's that well known phenomenon of 'exaggerating pain'. Sometimes if you tell someone something and they give you pity for it your brain thinks: 'well, this must really actually be a problem' and you'll feel even worse than when you told them and it'll just keep coming back. And no one likes that, no one likes making a big deal out of something that is essentially spilt milk...except when you're having a crap week or when there's a much larger problem but that's a whole nother ball game.

...*blink blink* How the hell did i get onto this?!!!?? It's like Dr. Phil but worse because i know even less about what i'm talking about than he does!!!!!!! *sigh* I bet you it doesn't even make sense. Either that or it's just commonsense.
Never mind. I'll put a warning sign at the top so people know to skip that if they want.
Brain: pfft, people. you make it sound as if anyone besides Zig reads these things.
me: i can dream
brain: and you thought you were going to write a short post.
me: And on that note, i'm ganna go to bed. My head hurts. We'll leave the rest of my rambling and theories for another night.

Sweet dreams, wonderlings.
yours,
Ristro